October 13, 2009

Throwing Mud

I've been doing this for quite a while.
During the 5 or 6 or whatever years it's been since I started recording my thoughts about college football online, I thought things were pretty well black and white around here. I've predicted things and hit them square on the head...I've predicted things that missed wildly. I've written things that anger millions and I've written things that lots of other people think, yet nobody really has the strength to say. But even after all that, throughout all those years...you'd think some of you would get to know me back.

Apparently, that's not the case.

Take this past Thursday, where nearly three years of pent up Husker frustration were unleashed on me and my writings in the form of hateful e-mails...snotty comments, rambling IM's and delusional radio host diatribes. If you're a Husker fan, and you're one of those people I just described...you probably won't believe me here...but I completely understand. You should run your mouth. Trust me on this, I expect it. Talking shit is a fine art that is only perfected by the few...and as you can probably see in the comments field, it appears that not one single reader of this blog is good at it. (Seriously, some of you should read through your comments before you hit 'send'. I'm embarrassed for you and I don't even like you)

For you see...talking shit about sports isn't about being opportunistic. It's not about yelling "scoreboard" after disappearing for 2 years. It's not like something out of an Eminem video...where one guy stands in front of a crowd, firing off 'yo momma' rhymes as the bass shakes the windows of the room. It's not trying to find the catchiest angle or uncovering that one stat that makes your point. It's not about calling people names. It's not about throwing out F-bombs and showing people how Internet badass you really are.

No, talking shit is about one thing and one thing only: Pissing the other guy off.

It might shock some of you to hear this...but I've hated Nebraska far longer than the 5 years I've run this or any other blog. And during that time...believe it or not...the Huskers actually managed to win a game or two during that time; Or in my case...pretty much all of their games all of the time. This is the #1 idiotic misnomer I hear nearly every single day...hell, I've heard it 3 times in the past 24 hours throughout the Internet universe, "When the Huskers get good, you'll slink back into your hole and disappear."

Oh quite the contrary.

When the Huskers "get good" is when Husker fans decide to open his mouth and say something stupid. It's when they suddenly show up from a 3 year hiatus trying to find that perfect insult to send me. It's when they suddenly decide to address a local blogger every segment of a radio show, when in years past he was completely ignored. It's when ridiculous claims come to light (Suh for Heisman? Seriously?) and when relatively smart people say completely idiotic and asinine things. (The Heisman trophy? Seriously?)

Am I upset my favorite team lost* on Thursday to a team that I feel is a complete sham? Sure it does. But when looking at things at face value, what do I see? This is where some of you this week completely lost track of truth and reality. For those of you who's scarlet and cream colored panties are still tightly wound into a bunch, I did not say the rain caused Missouri to lose* the football game. What I said was that the conditions changed the game so much that it's impossible to take anything away from it rather than the final score. That goes for both teams, including Nebraska...whom I'm sure has a bit more offensive firepower than 260 yards on "shitty" Mizzou's defense. If you think the weather had no impact on the game at all...one way or another...you are a dipshit. End of story. That doesn't change the final score, and I "accept scoreboard" just fine. It just doesn't prove anything more to me. (And don't get me started on "accepting the better team won", because I'm still waiting for that acceptance from last year that never ever came from any of you)

But I digress....I'm not here to defend my stance, because quite frankly..I could really give a damn what you think about it. I don't care if you saw it as a blowout Husker victory...nor do I care if you think the weather impacted the game or not. For you see, I don't really care that much about breaking down games...nor do I really care about Nebraska football in general that much anymore. If that fire still burned white hot...I'd still have the old blog up and you'd see me plastered to every Husker message board from here to Scottsbluff looking for a verbal fight to start with every DeKalb using hayseed I could find. Instead, I simply write down what I'm thinking..maybe tweet a few things..and suddenly I'm back to being public enemy #1.


When I arrived in Nebraska, the Huskers were on the verge of becoming one of the most dominant dynasties in the history of the game. When I was in my 20's, I put up with fans rampaging their arrogance into the ground with their 60 wins in 5 years...while my own team won 1/3rd that many in two decades. No, hating Nebraska and the gomers who root for them did not start for me in 2007. It started long ago and began as defending my own shitty team against buddies who constantly....ruthlessly and vigorously challenged me to talk trash and defend my crappy team against one of college football's biggest juggernauts. Do you know how hard it is to talk trash when you haven't beaten the other team in 24 years? Do you know ho hard it is to talk trash when Kirk Farmer is your quarterback? But I did it, and I did it well.

So with that...you think some fluke monsoon-aided loss* during a rebuilding year is going to send me over the edge? Well no offense...but you're giving yourself WAY WAY too much credit for something (I say again) that really didn't show me anything.

You see...my team doesn't win 4 games a year anymore. Guys like Kent Skornia and Darius Outlaw no longer line up under center, just as guys named Frazier, Crouch and Green no longer line up for the Huskers. Despite what your faded t-shirt says...those days are long since gone...and as many of you witnessed, I've already fought those dragons...and did so til the last one was killed on October 4th, 2008. Everything else since then...and everything else in the immediate future is simply a milepost in a post-apocalyptic world where your bullshit and my sense of doom really don't mean much of anything anymore. Hard to believe, but that 35 point ass-kicking last season really was the end of the line. When I said that was it..that really was it.

But if I'm the self-indulgent idiot many of you claim me to be...if I'm "not even worth the time to read"...then why are you here? Why do I get so much attention? Why did I get 2.2 million hits on my previous blog? Do I advertise on local radio? Do I start threads on random Husker and big 12 message boards touting my own abilities and whimsical savvy prose? Why am I not just another crappy blog written by some nutjob, just like the thousands of others that litter the cybersports landscape? Damned if I know. But I do know one simple thing: I know my audience and I know their weakness. I know what angers them and I know what makes them tick.

Congratulations Husker fan...apparently you beat* me this time. For one night, your team proved me wrong, and thanks to some divine intervention, you've had your day once again. But what about tomorrow? What about next week? What about the remainder of the season? I've said this before, and it remains true even more so today....my quest to expose Husker nation as fraudulent hypocrites ended a year ago, because there was nothing left to prove. Gone are the claims of classy elegance, and here are the days of passing around photos of crying players. (Which by the way will NEVER be as funny as crying kids you copyright stealing bastards.) Despite the end of that journey, the games continue...as will the ridiculous arrogance and false legend that is "classy" Nebraska football fans. In the end, all I know is that those Husker fans I railed against in the mid 1990's wouldn't be running out celebrating a late-game waterlogged victory* over a "lesser" opponent they're supposedly superior to. In fact...they wouldn't be running to me at all. They wouldn't even know who I am.

Until that day comes around again...you are exactly what I said you were...and nothing more. Because it's already been proven.



1) Kansas (5-0, 1-0) at Colorado
KU continues to score points at will, but continues to give up big plays in bunches. Todd Reesing is starting to get some Heisman hype, but KU's toughest test so far has been a 3-3 Southern Miss team...one they barely beat at home. Everything starts to go downhill with a very interesting trip to Boulder this week.

T2) Nebraska (4-1, 1-0) vs. Texas Tech
I thought about leaving Nebraska at 3rd this week, but didn't want to be charged with murder when 25,000 heads exploded. NU moves up to their highest spot ever on my poll, although I refuse to put them ahead of Mizzou based on what we've already discussed this week. Scoreboard is fine, but everything else must be earned. Beat Tech this week, you can have it all to yourself.

T2) Missouri (4-1, 0-1) at Oklahoma State
As stated before...I really can't take anything from that game given the conditions and variables involved. But at the same time, they still lost*, so where do I put them? Save your hate mail in the meantime. Gabbert and company head into a moonshine soaked Stillwater at night, so the odds of moving up after a big win are slim. Young teams generally don't bounce back after being shell shocked like that...so it will be interesting to see how fast..if at all...things go downhill.

4) Colorado (1-4, 0-1) vs. Kansas
Darrell Scott certainly looked pretty good early on against Texas, but the Buffs still rank near the bottom of FBS in rushing. Dan Hawkins finally pulled the trigger on Cody, so it will be interesting to see if some sort of spark is created. Watching the team that hung with Texas...I have a hard time they're going to go winless in the Big 12 for long. Plus, they're good for one big upset a year. Hmmmmm

5) Iowa State (3-3, 0-2) vs. Baylor
Gotta feel bad for the Clones. After a painful blocked extra point leading to a loss against KSU, you gotta admire Paul Rhoads' team for battling their asses off against an obviously bored and unprepared KU team. The clones currently rank 14th in rushing offense, but are averaging less than 200 yards through the air. If the Clones have ANY hope of becoming bowl eligible, a win over Baylor is a must right here.

6) Kansas State (3-3, 1-1) vs. Texas A&M
I realize winning in Lubbock is difficult, but Jesus people...38-0 at the half? Against their backup QB? I'm not ready to declare the Bill Snyder project dead before it really begins, but the Cats are going to have to figure out how to score if they hold any hope of climbing out of the North shitter anytime soon.


1) Texas (5-0, 1-0) vs. Oklahoma @Dallas
Either Texas is going to be one of those championship teams who tip toe through their schedule and look mediocre at times, but still get things done....or they're about due to fall on their face. Everybody and their pet squirrel are going with Texas this week, and at 47ppg, there's good reason. But they've seemed way too disinterested at time for me to believe they can just show up in Dallas and beat OU. I'm not a gambler, but if I was...I'd be seriously considering throwing money down on the Sooners.

2) Oklahoma (3-2, 1-0) vs. Texas @Dallas
I'm not sure if Baylor is really that much better, or if Oklahoma is that mediocre. Sure, OU is 3-2, but they've lost both games by a combined 2 points...and both were lost without last year's Heisman winner. OU comes into Dallas far more battle tested and you know Bob Stoops is already using his disrespect card on a daily basis in practice.

3) Oklahoma State (4-1, 1-0) vs. Missouri
The Pokes are banged up...Dez Bryant's status is completely up in the air...but they still are scoring points in large numbers. Granted, their stats aren't as eye popping as last year, and they've obviously lost a bit of their swagger after laying an egg against Houston...but there's too much talent here to simply disregard. Missouri isn't exactly a top flight offense these days...but they certainly have enough firepower to shake up an already shaky pass defense that ranks 89th in the country. Should be a good game...for a while.

4) Texas Tech (4-2, 1-0) at Nebraska
Tech had all sorts of trouble getting the ball away from Roy Helu last year in Lubbock...granted when they did get the ball, they scored at will. Against teams with a pulse, NU has choked away a game and needed 7 inches of water coupled with a gimpy QB to make their move. One thing the Hicks do have is confidence, and they're playing way above their heads right now. Gonna be a tough task for the Raiders to pull this out.

5) Texas A&M (3-2, 0-1) at Kansas State
Jerrod Johnson continues to put up big numbers...even now that the Aggies are now playing actual D1 caliber opponents. They weren't quite ready for prime time against a far superior Arkansas team...but played OSU far tougher than expected. This will be A&M's first true road test, in weather far from Texas-like. Huge game for Mike Sherman's team IMO.

6) Baylor (3-2, 0-1) at Iowa State
Poor Baylor. Down to a 3rd string freshman QB, they took Oklahoma's best punch, but in the end got knocked out. BU's previous experience at Wake Forest and against UConn should help them out, against what appears to be a quickly improving Iowa State squad. Neither team is all that good..but they appear to be matched up as evenly as any other matchup of the weekend.
Photo Credit - Associated Press


  1. Sometimes your flare for the dramatic is overwhelming.

  2. I love being Missouri's Super Bowl every year.

    27-12, in Columbia, ouch.

  3. Thanks Moses. If it was boring..nobody would read it and I wouldn't write it.

  4. Mud and Hatred. I have been following you since just days before the NU MU game when I first heard of you, and I love it, very entertaining and good for what "hopes" to be exciting games in the future, but my opinion wont happen.

    Trash (I will refrain from cursing) talking being a means of making people mad is laughable at best, the only ones that are getting "mad" are not getting mad because of the words you say but the mere logic (or lack thereof) behind your words.

    Why in any reason whatsoever would give anyone the idea that the better team did not win Thursday night? It was a SLOPPY game, there are no excuses and I am not saying you use excuses, the weather is only the reason not excuse why Nebraska won, last year MU had the better team then NU, Bill Callahans poor recruiting and coaching the years prior is not an excuse MU beat NU but the reason.

    Coulda shoulda woulda in good weather on a 71 degree day with clear skies and an ankle that didnt get injured because of a forced fumble tackle yada yada yada, nothing proves that MU is better and I will explain my logic, it is extremely hard to take MU serious, MU's best teams EVER 07 and 08 was able to win not BCS, not National, not conference but division championships (one shared with NU because of KU), and each time when MU had the chance to put the rubber to the road and win the Big XII championship, all the tires fell off. What is laughable also is one of BEST years in MU's history 07 division championship came at NU's worst in 50 years. Not to mention the almighty Mizzou was 2-2 against Nebraskas worst coach ever Billy C.

    Maybe it is coaching that makes MU the better team, ok since Gary Pinkel was hired is 4-6 against NU, the last 5 years Gary Pinkel is 3-2 which is 2-1 against Bill Callahan and 1-1 against Bo Pelini, so if we are looking at current coaches its even, and its even against the last 2 NU coaches 3-3 2-2 against BC and 1-1 against BP, so "logic" would say it isnt the coaching because if Pinkel makes MU a better team then NU he would not be even with the current Bo Pelini and NU's worst BC.

    So here is my logic in your hatred for NU and its fans and your NON logic in why you think MU is a better team.

    When I was growing up my little cousin and I would wrestle all the time, he was never able to get the upper hand let alone win, then one day I walked in the door not knowing he was in the room and he jumped on my back and put me in a head lock, he was able to hold it for about 3 seconds and to him it was very exciting, he finally had the upper hand in a battle that he never won, then once the 3 seconds was up I threw him off of me and commenced his butt whooping and he was never able to put me in a head lock again, I was bigger, stronger, smarter and just better and he hated me for it, so now whenever we have bbq's he always brings up that head lock because that was his moment of glory. Yes he did have the upper hand for that short moment and I acknowledge it, he got the better of me for 3 seconds and there is no denying it, kudos to him.

    Mizzou had the upper hand (if 2 division championships is the upper hand) for a couple years, but there is NO reason anywhere that says Mizzou is anything but a comet that comes around once every 40 years for a couple days then disappears again, and MU's inability to win at home in lousy conditions against a team playing there worst special teams of the year and a QB that couldnt hit the broad side of a barn for 3 quarters with a second year coach proves it. But win in Lincoln next year and we can talk again, but my money is Haley will be on her way to the other side of the universe.

  5. Moses- Sometimes your flare for the dramatic is overwhelming.

    AJ- Thanks Moses. If it was boring..nobody would read it and I wouldn't write it.

    LOGIC-the science that investigates the principles governing correct or reliable inference.

    Doesnt look to me like Moses said anything about it being boring, key words in the logic definition is "correct" and "reliable".

    One simple sentence in reply to Moses of yours was INCORRECT AND UNRELIABLE because your interpretation to what he said was false and untrue, thats only one sentence, what happens when you type 8 paragraphs about something you cant even read plain as day in front of your face? My answer to that would be nonsense.

    This is the reason why college football is the best!



    anonymous seems so shady

  6. Damn, those were actually two decent replies. WTF is wrong with you guys?

  7. It sounds like you cried as you wrote this blog. You are totally and utterly delusional. Nebraska had to play in the rain and when it stopped so did your chances. I love your use of apostrophes, it shows how pathetic you are. It must suck to live in Omaha and get busted up almost every year by Nebraska. I'm being nice by not posting your address on here or on Husker message boards. Get ready to lose 3 in a row b/c Gabbert is garbage.

  8. That's more like it.

    PS - Grammar smack? Always a winner.

  9. Well they were from the same person, and I look forward to future replies, keep the blogs and tweets coming, this could possibly??? be the start of a great North division rivalry, one can only hope, we were missing for a few years but heres to hoping we are getting back and Mizzou can keep it going....


  10. “as will the ridiculous arrogance and false legend that is "classy" Nebraska football fans” says it all. I actually kinda liked the huskers till I moved to Omaha, then I saw the light. Never in my life I have seen such pretentious fake fans. Every year there is always ‘someone’ on the team that deserves Heisman consideration, then husker-fanboy get all pissy when people laugh. At this point I just have to treat /most/ husker fans as mentally challenged. It’s the only way to make it through football season with these airheads. Whats also funny is most never even went to NU, but other universities. Cracks me up when then don’t even support their real Alma Mater.
    keep up the blog, good stuff.

  11. Hate and anger is a good thing.

  12. AJ Never Been LaidOctober 13, 2009 at 7:52 PM

    AJ I find your blog hilarious. Not because what you write is funny, but because you are so pathetic that you "get off" pissing people off. Let me guess you were the guy in high school who just had to be different? Most likely a loner who didn't play sports sound familiar? The internet is a great thing it gives losers like yourself a voice when most people find you pathetic and unappealing in life.

  13. Coulda shoulda woulda the best team won. Pick up an extra box of kleenex and get over (and used to) it. I liked your blog better when you didn't make excuses, but thats all you have now since THE BEST TEAM WON! What will your excuse be next week when you get waxed?

  14. So I'm pathetic blah blah blah...but you idiots not only read it..but felt the need to comment on it as well.

    So you don't care...but care enough to tell me about it? Got it. Good thing you don't make my points for me.

    Oh and PS...I get off pissing you off because it's funny to me.

    And yes...I didn't play sports at all.


  15. AJ:

    I hope you feel better now!

  16. i'm just trying to understand how you can assume all husker fans are hypocritical, poor sport, lousy fans? how many times, when you've been privileged enough to come to our turf, has you car been vandalized, or your physical safety been compromised?

    i'm not saying all missouri fans are that way, but i went to the monsoon this last thursday, and both of those things happened to me. i didn't go out trying to start a fight. i went to your home field to support a team i believe in. i think you'll find, on a whole, husker fans are pretty respectful if they are given respect in return.

    i don't hate missouri football; i root for them when they play other, non conference opponents. but when as a visiting fan, i get shit on, i don't take kindly to it.

    your blind ignorance is amusing. i have to admit, i laughed quite a bit while i was reading through your blog. (i have to say, i loved the asterisks following any time you referenced missouri losing. i'm curious, did we watch the same game?) the only reason i got here is because i was looking for a picture of suh from the game, and this was the third listing on google, but after reading it, i decided i'd have to leave my mark here. don't read too much into my post, as i'm just bored and thought you'd like to hear a non emotionally charged response to your hate filled rant.

    as for suh for heisman, yeah, i chuckled when i saw that article, but don't dismiss it. he is a dominant player, and only someone too blinded by something as asinine as a self righteous hatred for a college football team, of all things, would fail to realize that.

    in closing, you go right ahead and believe what you want, and i'll go ahead knowing what i know. the rain? it was a factor. the game? it was a good one. was i pissed off the first three quarters? yes. was i happy at the end of the the fourth? yeah sure, you betcha.

    aj, you keep on keepin' on. keep believing your team is superior. i'll go on thinking mine is.

    you have a lovely evening.


    geoff, a true husker fan

  17. As a die hard Husker fan I too think it is ridiculous to read some of the responses that are being given here, seems most Husker fans forget that we went through some VERY tough years staring in 04, however I have lived in southern cal, north carolina and a few other small college towns and every athletic team has the vile fans, non Husker fans living in this area say we are the worst only because you live at Nebraska university's front door step, Notre Dame fans spit on Eric Crouch after he scored the winning touchdown in 01, bad fans are EVERYWHERE!! But not all Husker fans are as bad as some, are we passionate about our team? Of course but so are Mizzou fans, that's apparent just by the fans that through beer bottles and pop bottles at the NU team before the game last thursday, or the guy who threatened the NU fan to throw him down 47 rows of stadium because he high fived his 11 year old daughter when NU scored, now that is some class if you asked me. All teams have them and I will continue to agree NU does too and will also point out yours when you all point out ours.


  18. Geoff, good rant.

    Fair enough.

  19. "For you see, I don't really care that much about breaking down games...nor do I really care about Nebraska football in general that much anymore"*

    "nor do I care if you think the weather impacted the game or not."*

    "my quest to expose Husker nation as fraudulent hypocrites ended a year ago"*

    "When I said that was it..that really was it."*

  20. Begin Standard Hick Template:

    I went to {Boulder, Columbia, Lawrence, Manhattan, Ames} and I { was spit upon, had batteries thrown at, had snowballs thrown at, was flipped off} and my {car, pickup, tractor, combine} had {been keyed, its tires slashed, been spraypainted, had its windshield smashed} and my {grandmother, girlfriend, mom, dog} was {cussed at, kneed in the crotch, bound and gagged, doused with radioactive waste} by the {Colorado, Missouri, Kansas, Kansas St, Iowa St} fans. They are the worst in the nation.

    End Standard Hick Template

  21. My only question would be were the batteries D or AAA cause that would make a difference between a complaint and a savings of 4 bucks next time the remote batteries go dead...

  22. I have been a Missouri fan all my life, through the worst and recently through the best. I hate NU football, I dispise ku period, and tailgate with the best or worst however you see it of long standing MU fans.
    I have NEVER witnessed, beer bottles being thrown, tires being slashed, windshields broken, fans being beaten, raped, mutilated or whatever other non-sensical berating you claim to have had happened to you.
    Support your huskers, fair enough, we will support our Tigers, but shut the fuck up about shit that does not happen. Jeez, you won, great go home and enjoy it, who care what we Tiger fans say after the fact, or before for that matter. We despise you and your irrogance, you are not annointed, you are just a college football team. You will wil some, you will lose some.
    You want to know who real fans are?? Try being a Missouri fan since 1970! No go back to your combines!

  23. Oh come on, everybody.

    Anybody who has ever watched a college football game knows that the worst fans in the world--hands down--reside in Boulder, CO.

    They've had good teams up there from time to time, but the fans suck ass.


  24. Here's all the proof you need. Mizzou fans revealed for who they really are!!! http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=87533344949

  25. Holy Hell! After reading through the comment about cars being vandalized and physical assaults having been issued, I thought "did I miss the Huskers visit to Boulder this season?" It sounded just like the standard issue "CU has the worse fans ever" diatribe we hear from Huskers every year.

    So the "Standard Hick Template" which followed was especially hilarious. Funny how anyone who happens to dare call out "the best fans in the world" suddenly represents the "worst fans in all college football". Poor Husker fans. So picked on. So hated.

    And so sad after getting served up by TTU. Worse still, the Buffs might just actually have turned things around with plenty of time to work on any remaining kinks before the annual Thanksgiving "rivalry" game.

    Keep up the great work, AJ. And GO BUFFS!

  26. Great job by the Buffs last night...Hansen is the real deal it appears.

    Sorry for the lack of posts...had a slight computer crash and trying to fix all that before I write anything further. Hopefully Monday or Tuesday.

  27. Karma, pure and simple. Omaha ABC station cuts away from the end of a close Texas -Oklahoma game (one with national implications) to start coverage of a realtively meaningless Nebraska - Texas Tech matchup. So what did the mindless masses get for being so appeased? Cornholers down by 14 before the end of the Red River Rivalry. Sweet mother of Jesus that was poetic. I haven't had that much fun since watching the Kansas Spirit of 76 Memorial Gang Rape two years ago. Karma.

    Standard Hick Template - LMAO, that's some funny shit. Gonna hang that one up at work.

    KETV sucks donkey balls.

    Roll Tide.

    Bama Joe